steve1

Steve King, is a Men’s Grooming Expert, broadcaster and journalist. He is a former editor of Men’s Health Magazine, as well as numerous women’s magazines. He was also the resident expert on Channel 4’s Richard & Judy Show and wrote fashion and grooming columns in both The Sunday Express and The Mail on Sunday.

He is the foster parent to three children, aged 12, seven and four-years-old and is a true believer that women are not the only ones who need a helping hand in the “looking their best” department.

Steve is a grooming guru to be reckoned with and will stop at nothing to help turn the nation’s men into “Dishy Daddies!”

(Follow him on Twitter too – he now has more than 320,000 followers – check out why… TWITTER @findstevek)

Hello folks – ready for Summer? I say that in sincerity – and with crossed fingers behind my back as we feverishly plan for the King Annual Summer BBQ – think the Ewing BBQ from the old TV show Dallas – minus the pool but with all the same characters and just as much drama!
We’re aiming for a Nigella-esque, scatter-cushion, coloured jam jar glass and eclectic colour theme this year – not sure how that’s going to pan out – but watch this space. There’s bound to be a drama – well I’m secretly hoping there is – if only the real Sue Ellen was coming – but sadly we have just the 20 or so who’ve RSVPd yes, plus their children – including three with nut-allergies, one vegetarian, a 5/2 dieter and a someone whose lactose intolerant.. Seriously – it’s certainly going to present some culinary challenges let me tell you – well for Waitrose and M&S – certainly not for me!images
We also had a cheeky little trip to the North of Scotland to celebrate my parents’ Golden Wedding Anniversary. Great company, beautiful scenery – shame about the lodges – make sure you check out my travel report and avoid booking where we did!
We’re also preparing for our trip abroad and I’m determined the little one, who is four and soon to be starting school (sighs with relief) will be an Olympic swimmer in time for the holiday. We’ve enrolled him in Swimming Boot Camp and I’m hoping by the time August comes he’ll be channelling all things aquatic – let’s face it the poor kids are going to have to live in the pools to survive the nuclear-heat!
So I eventually found a swimming teacher who could fit our little one into our already packed schedule. We turned up at the allotted time and walked poolside. I didn’t realise Paris Fashion Week had decamped to our neck of the woods. Seriously, I should have guessed by the Range Rover Vogue count in the car park that this was more than your average swim session. Talk about glamour. I’ve never seen so many Birkins outside at Hermes store – and the Louboutins – the red sole was still showing through this plastic elasticated bootee shoe covers they all put on.
Being the new kids as it were I was very unsure as to what the score would be and so waited to be told by the coach. He simply said: “What would happen if I was to push the little fella in the pool now.” slightly taken aback at this unorthodox approach, but well aware I was being scrutinised from head-to-toe by the Birkin brigade, I simply replied confidently: “Oh he’d swim to the side and get out.” – another fingers crossed behind my back mentally moment.
imagesSo it began. Assorted Noah’s Tarquin’s, A Blaze and even a Euphemia (I thought that was a Victorian illness)  stood at the deep end of the pool and one by one they were told to mount those racing starter step things and vault into the pool. Our little chap looked slightly dazed and stood at the end of the short line. I was in total meltdown. Half thinking I should just say: “He’s really not that confident.” But before I knew it, the little blighter was on the block and then he was in deep water.  With a fixed grin I waited for a split second until I saw his curly curly hair bob to the surface and then confound me – the little bugger SWAM to the steps and joined the back of the line.
All that worrying eh? So the lesson progressed and the little chap did so well.
Towards the end, the instructor asked all the parents to line the edge of the pool and the children were to take it in turns to jump in and swim across the breadth of the pool to their respective parents. So up the line we went – each of the kids jumping almost the entire way and swimming the few strokes necessary to complete the task. When finished, parents reached over and plucked their offspring from the water and wrapped them in Egyptian Cotton towels (note to self – don’t bring Spiderman towel cape next time).
Anyway our little fella does it and he desperately tries to heave himself out of the pool. But he’s clearly knackered by this point. So, I reach over and grab his hands. Next thing I know, my plastic show cover bootees are slipping and in I go – arse over – straight into the water. It was certainly not subtle or graceful. There wasn’t a hint of Tom Daley – more Shelly Winters in The Poseidon imagesAdventure (Youtube it!) – anyway the assembled throng looked on in absolute horror. Think – your little one has just pulled down their pants and wee’d all over someones leg – horrified and your almost there!
Thankfully I hauled myself out the pool sharpish and the little one thought it was quite hilarious. However, driving back home with only a four-year-olds Spiderman Cape towel to sop-up the water was not pleasant.
The care still reeks of chlorine and before you asked I strangely could no longer make that weekly swimming lesson slot – due of course, to unforeseen circumstances, and we now go on a different day. Thankfully it’s a different set of ‘rents with equally expensive handbags and equally unsuitably named kids.
Right folks, I need to rescue the dog from the clutches of the little one. Apparently she needs to be disguised as a dinosaur – which involves him sticking loo rolls on her back – that poor dog!
Until next time – be good and if you’re heading off on holiday have a safe trip, enjoy your time away and don’t moan about the weather… I’ll be doing enough of that for all of us!