As a forty-something woman juggling her career, an apathetic ex and her growing girls, there has been little time for her love life. But she hopes by on-line dating – she will change all that. She is joining match.com; EHarmony and Guardian Soulmates in the hope that by putting herself out there, she will increase the chances of a date.
OK, so being back ‘out there’ is quite a daunting thing.
Your head is saying, you know you want to meet someone, but a big part of you doesn’t want to have to do it this way.
I mean you’ve done all that. You met your man, got married, had the kids. Started out on family life. But then it just didn’t work out that way. Two people who lived together but didn’t really like each other that much. So it’s not that I wish I was back with Dave but this does feel a bit alien to me. Still I know two people who met their second husbands on match and EHarmony, so I’m going to give it a try.
So I sat down with a glass of wine and a couple of my girlfriends and compiled my profile. I picked a slightly younger picture of myself, of course, and some ones from our last holiday. (You always look good in the sun).
Oh but how we laughed. Like tears rolling down our cheeks, holding our stomachs laughs when we thought of all the things we could put in this profile. Like – using a fake pic of a super-model and saying how much she liked sex games and flings in the forest… it was hilarious to us at the time, perhaps the wine? Anyways, got to keep the sport in any new situation.
On match, it’s quite simple to set up a profile. You just have to fill out a form about things about you and what you’re looking for – things like, describing your shape, the colour of your eyes, the kind of movies/books you like. You have to compile an ad – so mine says ‘Cheeky full of fun brunette seeks dashing Mr Darcy… but in the real world Mr Reasonably ok with own teeth and a job will be great!’ My friends and I think this is quite funny. Not demanding or taking myself too seriously… and we fill out the rest of the form honestly but our tongues firmly in our cheeks.
On match you wink at people or they wink at you. Not physically. If you read someone’s profile, and you like it, you press the ‘wink’ button. You get sent six potential dates every day and then you can search the 70 odd thousand members they boast to have on the site.
There are some seriously good looking blokes on there and so for a moment, I feel quite hopeful. It does feel a little bit like putting yourself in a shop window though for men to look at you… which feels a bit like you’re being exposed but the men are in the shop window too, so you just have to get over that.
It’s costs around £33 per month, so I pick a package for six months and I’m ‘live’ on the site… EHarmony next.